What is the attraction with sin?

On a recent trip to Las Vegas I saw things from a totally different perspective. As I have been fortunate enough to have been there a few times before I could look at things from a different perspective this time and ponder a question that the answer still alludes me. But after reading a book titled 'As a man thinketh" and then visiting Vegas I feel the answer to my question is nearer. The question by the way is, 'Why do we continue to indulge in practices that we know aren't good for us'?

Witnessing Las Vegas from a parental perspective, plus being in a completely different place in the self development phase forced me to view things differently. Seeing gamblers in action at all hours of the day and night, drinking, smoking, violence, stealing as well as sex, drugs and homelesness openly displayed really made me ask why is this place so appealing? Not to mention the cheap and nasty food options on tap. My findings are that the majority of us (humans) are fixated with satisfying our desires by indulging in what is perceived to be pleasurable and satisfying past times. Unfortunately the satisfaction is short lived so we go back again and again for more in a bid to feed our desires and try and find happiness. Only to find that feeding desires makes us more unhappy and unsatisfied. I feel the only form of happiness can ever come from within and when this occurs we will never have to rely on external sources and indulgences to satisfy us.

Learning to control our mindsets, to be one of complete abundance and to serve, rather than to desire, want and indulge ourselves and promote our importance in front of others, only serves us to continuously keep seeking external sources of satisfaction that will never fill the missing void of internal happiness. Do you constantly feel like there must be more to life? Well I reckon there is but it isn't external; it's internal. I won't go on too much but I feel if you can follow a few guidelines to start with you may start to see what a difference changing your mindset can make and sinful desires will slowly lose their appeal.

1. Become a servant to a cause or others
   
2. Don't get angry learn to forgive instead
   
3. Drop the opinions - who says you are right all the time
4. Learn to be happy inside before looking for happiness externally

If you begin to implement these four principles into your line of thought your actions will follow suit just as the fruit follows the seed.

What a Waste of Energy

Holidays, travel, adventure, I love them all and even getting up at two in the morning didn't bother me to get to the airport in time. I'm off to America for three weeks to stay in San Diego - California with my sister in law. But it's not all about me, in fact I am here to tell you about a situation I witnessed at the airport that was so petty and avoidable yet it consumed 7 people directly and others indirectly and started a day off horribly wrong for those involved.

Whilst lining up to check baggage in a mother and daughter were patiently waiting in front of a mother and son. All was quiet as you would expect until another young girl rushed up to the mother and daughter combo to embrace and get ready for their voyage together. Then the issue arose whereby the father (not in line) of the mother and son combo waiting behind the girls rushed up to confront and take the lady to task for pushing in. Well as you can imagine emotions were out of control and all were left scowling, shaking heads and in general emotionally disrupted. What was worst the father then walked off to leave all involved to feel very uncomfortable with each other.

What's my point? I'm big on living your life according to principles and guidelines and one very important one to me is 'first things first'. Well this was first thing in the morning and if this was the way they all kicked off their day and no one was prepared to see the others point of view, admit wrong doing, apologise or even agree to disagree, the rest of the day for each and everyone involved would of been filled with resentment and anger which may well eventuate in angry or resentful actions at some stage. Outcome being a wasted day and by constantly repeating this pattern of emotional unconsciousness lives will be marred by blaming others, resentment, revenge and the notion that the world revolves around them and their situation.

To avert the problem I feel they would of been better off

1. Understanding each others point of view before putting their own case forward.
2. Look for a win/win solution rather than just a win for themselves.
3. Then apologise or at least move on and forget about the issue as no more could be done. If nothing else forgive the other and feel sorry for them for being so arrogant and ignorant to others and their situations.
   

If conflict is a constant in your life please think about this. Your thoughts control your actions and until you control your thoughts you will never control your actions.

Are you digging deep enough?

Waking up today I was a little hazier that usual and then reality hit me. My family has deserted me or I have deserted them maybe more to the point. As I write, Adriana (wife), Sabina, Tyrone and Daniella (kids) are all on board a Qantas flight to Los Angeles and will be ushered down to San Diego to spend a month with Adriana's sister's family. I decided to stay a week longer at home to get some business dealings all sorted and then I will meet them there in a weeks time. Now that I've explained myself I'll get to the point. My greatest and deepest core value is my family and I already miss them but there is an upside; as we must always find in times of adversity.

I have some deadlines that others want me to meet for my own business interests and I can now devote the next week to solely satisfying my business/hobby needs and the other parties. If the family was here with me now I wouldn't be dedicating the time required to meet the deadlines others are requiring of me. Notice I didn't say couldn't. Because I work for myself this may seem strange but I have committed to an agreement that requires me to produce a product that someone else will sell for me!!!

The point being I was prepared to miss their required deadline because I was satisfying my family values and in turn keeping my passion for life as high as a kite. At the end of the day if I wasn't happy with my life (by not satisfying my deepest and dearest values) my output will be substandard, my relationship with my family substandard and my drive and purpose would lose its sting pretty quickly. Opportunities to make money will always be there but you and your values may not be so make the most of them.

What's my point? Are you aware of your deepest inner core values and if you are; are you satisfying them on a daily or weekly basis? If the answer is no to any of the questions above you are probably not as satisfied and as passionate about your life as you could be. You do have a choice and it's about time you started making the right ones for you - not for others or to satisfy others needs. Ask yourself theses 3 questions to start digging deep to find your own deepest core values.

1. If you were guaranteed success in anything you did what would you like to be doing right now in your life - and what emotions does the thought of you living this life stir up for you?
2. Do you hop into bed at the end of each day knowing your actions during the day have scratched the itch your values create and do you wake up in the morning looking forward to attacking your day passionately driving your satisfaction levels for living to an all time high.
3. What would you like said about you when you retire or as we all will; move to another life -what would you like to be remembered for most in your life?

Answering these questions is not a 5 minute exercise but if you are serious about living a life with passion and fulfilment I suggest you ask them and take the time to record your answers. It will start you on the way to getting your own personal mission statement. Answer the questions in order otherwise the exercise will not be as effective. Leave a comment so I can see how you went.

Have you ever heard of mood proofing yourself?

Wow I have just finished listening to an unbelievable interview via a podcast I subscribe to and boy was it good. So good I want to share the message I took out of it. Basically my take on it is, no matter where you are in life; at the top of the success ladder, the bottom or somewhere in between, the same battles and challenges are still going to appear. The interview in question was between a mentor of mine Scott and a pracademic (practical academic) William Sukala who is just about to complete his PHD. His studies and research involve special at risk populations and empowering them to use exercise to counter and stop these conditions.

But the two big factors I took out of the interview to share with you is to do with your mindset and how your actions are ruled by it. Anyone involved in our wellness coaching program will know the importance I place on our mindset and William reinforces this. He has consciously mood proofed himself which simply put, means he is totally aware of his mind when things get tough. And in these tough times he makes sure his processes are right and reassures himself he is on the right path and to keep persisting. He also has Emergency Standing Orders (ESO) which he follows when his outlook and positivity is tested. Again his process is checking his personal mission statement (PMS) and making sure the path he is taking, when the struggle mentally begins, is in line with his PMS. Combining these ritualised tools in his armoury safe guard him against anxiety and worry. To quote him, "the future isn't here yet so why worry about that and the past has gone, so there's nothing you can do about that now".

I took so much out of this interview and I hope my message gets through to you in the same way. But to assist you to mood proof your mind and start making your own Emergency Standing Orders try following these steps when anxiety and worry starts to toxify your mindset.

1. Stop and listen to the messages you are broadcasting to your subconscious mind
2. Qualify those thoughts and ask yourself are the thoughts which will control my actions helping me achieve my desired outcome in life
3. Make a choice whether you entertain that thought further or disregard it totally and put a consequence to the choice you make
4. Take absolute responsibility for the choice you make and don't deviate from this responsibility. Don't become a victim.

I'll leave you with a famous Einstein quote that William the great repeated. The definition of insanity is seeking a different outcome yet taking the same course of action over and over again. Is that you?

William Sukala's website can be found at http://www.williamsukala.com/

Is scarcity making you unwell?

Let's face it not many of us really enjoys getting mad, angry or upset. And from a wellness perspective being in these far from harmonious states is not going to help you achieve wellness and well being. I've mentioned it before but scarcity can be a huge factor in allowing these negative emotions to enter your world. So to set the scene for where I am headed I want you to open up your mind and recall how any conflict, difference of opinion or how someone's actions has upset you and what caused the negative outcome. Then I will get you to back up a little and investigate.

Let me give you a couple of examples to highlight what I'm getting at. Say the poor old mother in law has come over and whilst you were out or busy on some other task she has put draino or bleach in the washing machine and washed your favourite clothes. Obviously they will be damaged and apart from being favourites you will have to go spend more money replacing them when it wasn't even your fault. Another one is you may not have left instructions to someone who is assisting you on a task in fear of sounding directive or forceful and then finding out the job hasn't been done right. Anger and resentment may kick in. Both highlight scarcity as fear has dictated how you approached the situation and how you felt about the outcome.

These outcomes and feelings could of been avoided by simply changing your mindset from scarcity to abundance. We know scarcity is living in fear of or a lack mindset and abundance is a mindset of plenty, opportunity and empowerment don't we? Back to the mother in law the situation is not going to change and holding onto the anger and resentment over the result stems from the fear of spending money then you are thinking subconsciously that there is a lack of money. This thinking will block any opportunity of earning, winning or attracting more money to come to you. With the job example, your fear of losing friends or sounding bossy stops you making your position known. You can't ever be in a leadership or entrepreneurial role as your scarcity mindset will block these opportunities from appearing to you and hence your ability to grow and develop yourself. These are just two of millions of examples I could of used but the underlying factor is - it is your choice as to whether you live in scarcity or abundance.

Here is a guide to get you to change over and start thinking abundantly.

1. Monitor when you shy away from situations or when you feel negative emotions invading your head space.
2. Identify what the underlying factor is that is doing this to you. Is it money, belief, ability or just that it is different and uncomfortable.
3. Challenge the identified factor that is causing all the fear. Ask yourself or even better write it down and get the logical part of your mind disputing your thought patterns that take you into scarcity.
4. Flip your mindset and get uncomfortable. Now you have identified and challenged the scarcity causer turn it around and you have the abundant mentality causer. Push through this part as it takes courage and persistence to change.

Find out why oppostite is great.

Be different is what I am saying. And what's more be proud about it. My reasoning for saying this is the world would be a really boring place to be in if we were all the same. And on reflection and generally surmising my circle of influence too many individuals are conforming to the mentality of it's the way things are done, it's how it is or it's what everyone else is doing so it must be OK. I'm here to encourage you to branch out and discover you and what it is that you can turn around in your lifestyle that will make a world of difference to your fulfillment, performance, enjoyment, success and wellness. Back up a little and start smelling more roses.

How many times do you hear someone say I don't have time do do that or I can't fit it in I already do to much. It is very common isn't it. Well let me say one thing - If you haven't got the time to do it, you need to do it more so. Meaning if you haven't got time to play with the kids, do some activity, go and meet a friend for coffee, have a massage or anything else that you would like to do just for you and your mindset is telling you you haven't got time. You need to make time and realise what is more important in this very short lifetime of yours.

A great example of thinking differently or outside the box is something I recently read about Donald Trump. His father discouraged him to build and develop real estate in Michigan (USA). He had the odds stacked against him and everyone told him he was nuts. He thought the opposite to them and the difference is he acted differently to them also. Look at the success he has had since and you would say his decisions were justified. His quote to illustrate his attitude which he calls going against the tide is, "Great minds have purposes, others have wishes".

My point being; everyone is busy. Everyone can justify not making better lifestyle choices by quoting work or other commitments that aren't as important as you and your wellness creation efforts. But at the end of the day is that reason going to make you happier, more fulfilled and give you the total freedom you would like? If not make some changes today that will take you closer to a more fulfilling and better quality existence.

Are you a happiness bounty hunter?

Just thought I'd slip in a quick thought that has been with me for a while. And If I am completely up front about it what I am about to talk about here is something that has caused me a great deal of uncertainty in my short but eventful life. It is the materialism conundrum and where you sit with it all and more importantly why do you feel like you do about it. Lets explore it more and then I will let you explore it more in your own head space.

In today's society it is not uncommon for people to shift around in their jobs, houses, girlfriends, wives and cars. It would be fair to say a lot of the toing and froing is in order to get something bigger, better that will in perception make your life more complete or better. My thoughts are this causes undue stress and creates the never happy syndrome (if there is one). Because buying the better car, the better house, the designer label sunnies and so on will only keep you happy for so long until the next big thing in your eyes hits your world. Where as if you look at constantly investing in your internal happiness and fulfillment the perception that you need materials to keep you satisfied will quickly dissipate. Not to mention the money and stress it will save you.

As an example you can go on a trip to the other side of your country or another country and get so much joy and fulfillment from the mere fact that you are there seeing another way of life and experiencing the culture. Or you can go out and look at the material things in your vicinity or go chasing them in a bid to satisfy yourself. I call it internal versus external happiness hunting and I am not saying one is right or wrong but I want you to think which category you fall into and beware of the alternative. Open up your mind to the possibility that you can have your cake and share it yet still be fulfilled and then don't feel the need to go looking for a bigger or better one to show the world how good or successful you are.